WHAT!? NO OCTOBER SURPRISE YET? COME ON, KARL! YOU'RE SLACKING!!

I have been worrying off and on for the past six months about what kind of October Surprise Karl Rove and his friends have planned for the coming election. However, I find that as November 2 quickly approaches, I am worrying about such a possibility less and less. Revealing anything horriblly negative about Kerry with such a short time before the election would tend to be seen as transparent b.s. by anyone with conncecting synapses, and it would probably not be taken seriously by a great numbers of voters. Nothing would be too likely to happen now that would change voters' minds, anyway... well, maybe not unless it was something like internet-displayed films of a candidate having sexual relations with a goat, or of some other such atrocious behavior.

Just the same, the little voice of doubt keeps whispering in the back of my mind: "As long as Karl Rove is alive and breathing, you should be afraid... very afraid!"

Don't think for a moment that I'm suggesting that someone should find a way to off Karl. After all, anyone with a nickname like Turd Blossom either has to be a really great guy, or else he has deadly halitosis, for which he should be pitied. I'm just suggesting that Karl will fight the Democrats with every mean little fiber of his being, and that he is right there beside Bush, guiding his nearly every step. As long as that's the case, Democrats should be prepared for anything.